YANNERS

santanaslittlelesbo:

heartless:

when i was in elementary school this fucking bitch claimed that she was queen of the jungle gym and would never let anyone use it so i told her i was telling the teacher and i walked over to the teacher and pointed near her and said “isn’t the sky so pretty today” and she started crying because she thought i told and long story short i was the king of the mother fucking jungle gym

You live up to your url…

iamwandastryder:

the-tardis-saved-sherlock:

sherlockismysuicidenote:

slutsy:

i told my duck he looked like a loaf of bread 

this was his response 

WHY DO YOU HAVE A DUCK

WHY DON’T YOU HAVE A DUCK

BECAUSE I AM WILL HERONDALE

encourage:

Shout out to the people who have already asked the exact questions from my homework on yahoo answers

pyrilia:

my dads renovating his kitchen and he called me out of my room to help him but when i came out

so i called him and

IM PSSING MYSELF HES JUST CHILLING IN THE ROOF HE DIDNT EVEN NEED MY HELP OMFG

encourage:

if you think i’m ugly now you should have seen me in 2009

you could give me 43 years to do homework and i wouldnt do it until the night before

babyferaligator:

vectoriuhh:

babyferaligator:

did you guys hear about the dude that got the entire left side of his body cut off?

he’s all right now

no he’s dead

ofsherlock:

i hate how you’re just born out of nowhere and you’re forced to go to school and get education so you can get a job what if i wanted to be a duck

some thoughts are so private that you only share them with a therapist or 17,000 people on the internet

thecompanionsdoctor:

My week is basically:

• Monday
• Monday #2
• Monday #3
• Monday #4
• Friday
• Saturday
• Pre-Monday

somuchfandoms:

like… what even

inspires you to

write such things 

that dont make 

any sense

WHAT SO EVER

catswithbenefits:

ever wondered what the exact spot you’re sitting in looked like 10,000 years ago

defcock:

ofgeography:

1. do you identify as a woman

2. congratulations you’re a real woman

a+

bigtimejessemacbelieber:

so i was in class looking at my nails and i see that my nail polish chipped off in the shape of a head 

but then i looked some more and thats not just any head, thATS BRUNO MARS

treeyonce:

resume: sometimes i can draw straight lines without a ruler

things we need on tumblr

• a notification when someone responds to an ask
• no post limit
• a ‘sent’ folder
• urls that haven’t been used for a year to be deleted

things we dont need on tumblr

• every update tumblr has ever made ever

thorhead:

thorhead:

I wonder if the young girls playing on the trampoline next door know that

1. I can see them
2. I can hear them singing You Can’t Stop The Beat from Hairspray
3. they are really bad singers and
4. I can probably get a YouTube-worthy video of them from my current position

gUYS I PUT ON MY COUSINS HOCKEY MASK AND STOOD AT THE WINDOW AND YELLED “STOP YOUR INFERNAL SINGSONG I’M TRYING TO MURDER HERE” AND THEY SCREAMED AND TRIED TO RUN AWAY AND ONE FELL OVER AND STARTED CRYING

hungarian:

today in class someone sneezed & my teacher told them to shut up

danphils:

my new motto in life

lovability:

conor-cymex:

mydogsnokes:

i will not buy flowers for a girl because flowers are stupid and worthless and they die like really fast. get a girl a rock. rocks are strong. rocks don’t die after 2 days

diamond

the word you’re looking for is diamond

omfg

randomstuff134:

sodamnrelatable:

take a moment to realize you have never seen your face in person, just reflections and pictures

some scientists agree that if you saw a clone of yourself, you wouldn’t recognise it as you, because our idea of what we look like is so different from what we actually look like

introspective-:

graveyardexplorers:

sometimes i only shave one leg so i lie down it feels like i’m laying next to a man

this is the saddest thing ive ever seen on the internet

tatertotblaine:

the price of a popcorn and soda at target: $1.99

the price of a popcorn and soda at the movies: an entire month’s rent and your first born child